8) Gender Equality.
As I am writing about this, most of the male readers might get annoyed with me, but, female readers, I can think of them becoming my fan.
Jokes apart, are we really interested even to know or think about this? I do agree with the fact, girls are now making out their way in a globalized world to work along with boys on every professional front possible.
A person is educated, so that he/she should be able to take own decisions of his/her life.
But, do they still have become an integral part in taking decisions on family matters? Are they even free enough today, to take their own decisions of life?
Why a girl after marriage has to bind herself with the customs, traditions, ways and rituals performed at her husband’s place? Why can’t we think of, to give her a chance to teach us a different and a better manner in which a ritual or an occasion is celebrated, which she has learnt for past around 24 – 25 years at her place? Why she has to leave her family name, only to get attached with our one?
I always feel proud then about a girl, who has that strength enough to leave behind her a surrounding in which she has been brought up. She has to part ways with her parents; friends; relatives only for a cause of marriage.
I don’t say ‘Ghar Jamai’ ban jao, but, can we for that matter show some support; respect; and love for a girl who has left behind her own family to make ours an integral part of her life.
Also, what about the aspirations of a girl, after her education? I don’t think today also there are people around who will allow their daughter – in – law or for that matter a husband would support a wife, to aspire for her dreams after marriage. Or is the education of a girl child limited only to get her married in a well settled family.
This trend is moving south in direction, but, that too only because of high standard of living conditions; and to manage the household expenses in metropolitan cities. Still a girl only has to live up to her in laws expectations, along with a job. Why can’t a guy think of helping out a girl in daily chores of a married life, to make it a perfect one?
Sacrifice of a career is always due on a girl, can a guy ever think of it, if a wife is having better career prospects than a husband. Killing of someone’s aspiration is a sin and it should not happen in anyone’s case, be it a girl or a guy.
9) Blind follow up of Traditions and Rituals.
This is not meant at all to hurt anyone’s emotions or feelings, which people have for their customs and traditions, around which a person’s life revolve from the day he/she starts to breath, till the end of journey on earth.
A person is pure in its form only at the instance he/she arrives in the world, making its way out of the womb of a mother. After that a name is attached to the person.
A name of a: Country; Region; Religion; Caste; Sub Caste; Family. A child who is not even aware of his/her existence, is bound to all the Traditions; Rituals; and Customs attached to the name with which it has to start life only to end with the same given name.
Every coin has two sides attached to it, goes a very old proverb. So, every given name must be having something Good and something Bad as an integral part of it. Do we then give an enough freedom to our highly qualified children to praise the Good and at the same time criticize the Bad things attached to the name, with which they are living?
It is said that: An education is imparted to a child for enabling him/her to think and understand the Good and Bad things of life. Do we really give that chance even, to a child for him/her to take the decision upon accepting the Excellent and discarding the Appalling attached to the given name of him/her (Then be it, Name of: Family; Sub Caste; Caste; Religion; Region; and Country)?
I would like to share herewith 2 instances of my life regarding this heading I am writing about:
1st Instance:
I was in 1st year of engineering, and my cousin’s wedding was scheduled in the same year.
Everything was going around smoothly in the marriage. When I saw a ritual, which really perturbed me and still it gives me a shiver in my body; about how can one think about it also, though it being a tradition.
It was about: Girl’s parents have to wash the feet of to be Son – in – Law.
I asked my Dad about this, when he told me, it being part of some ritual. I was plainly taken aback by this. I asked him a very simple question to which, I think every person in this world will be unanswerable if he/she agrees with this tradition or any such similar kind of custom happening in their Caste; Religion; likewise same happened with my Dad:
Can you ever in your weirdest dream also think of: Allowing your parents to wash your feet? Then how can in the name of tradition alone, a person can think of allowing someone else’s parents to wash one’s feet?
I had once a very good debate on this with one of my friend, who told me something like this:
Aisi kuch manyata (Belief) hain ke, aisa kuch karne se Swarag ki prapti hoti hain.
And that too, alone Girl’s parents are bound to abide this tradition. I am not here to play ‘Tit for Tat’, but, then Boy’s parents are not supposed to behave the same with to be Daughter – in – Law. Kya ladke ke Maa Baap ko swarag ki prapti nahi chahiye hoti hain kya? Then I will always pray for a Girl child, as I don’t want myself to land up into hell.
Aur shayad isi ko kehte hain: 100 chuhe khakar billi chali Haj ko.
By doing this alone we are assured of going to Heaven after end of our breath. Let alone then whatever might be the number of Sin we perform, which assures our entry to Hell.
2nd Instance:
I had a good discussion with a very great friend cum elder brother of mine, Rajesh Hendge. He explained me the blind follow up of traditions, in a very simple and subtle manner with a help of a story, which I would like to narrate hereby (In Hindi):
Ek gaon main, ek pujari raha karta tha. Uska naam tha: Harkishan. Harkishan ka kaam gaon ke Mandir main roj shaam ko havan karvana hota tha. Uske paas ek pyari billi bhi thi, jo usne bade laad pyaar se apne saath rakhi hui thi. Par uske saath ek dikat hua karti, woh jab bhi havan par baith ne jata, uski billi uske aas paas mandarane lagti. Pujari ko darr tha, ki kahi billi uchlte kudte hue kisi din havan main na gir jaye. Isliye usne is par upay dhundha aur us din ke baad se woh har roj havan ke samay billi ko rassi se ek kone main bandhkar, bade sukun se puja karne laga.
Din mahine saal bite, pujari ka ek din swarg waas ho gaya. Uske baad gaon ke mandir main havan karne ki jimedari, uske shishya: Raghu, par aa gayi. Raghu ko bhi pujari ki billi se bada lagav tha, aur woh uska har samay khayal rakhta. Par billi ke nathkat svabhav ke chalte, woh bhi use rassi se ek kone main bandhkar, sukun se puja karta.
Aise hi phir aur din mahine saal bite, billi ka bhi dehant ho gaya. Raghu ke budhepan ke chalte uski jagah ab uske bete: Chandan, ne le li.
Jab pehli baar Chandan mandir main havan karne baitha toh aas paas khade logon ne usse kaha: ‘Arey, tumne havan ko shuruvat kaise ki, pehle kisi billi ko rassi se toh bandhkar ek kone main khada karo, phir hi havan ho payega sahi dhang se’.
I think this story tells a lot about the topic I am discussing herewith, and no further explanation would be needed on.
To name a few more, prevalent in Indian society:
1) Manglik
A concept beautifully presented in: Munna Bhai Lage Raho.
2) Dowry
Today also, in Indian Matrimony Market, dissimilar degree holders are having different price tags.
Engineer: Rs. 10, 00,000;
MBA: Rs. 25 to 30, 00,000;
Doctor: Rs. 30 to 50, 00,000.
Again these degrees fetch more if you are an IIT/IIM/AIIMS pass out.
Parents of to be husband takes pride in these issues, but, my sincere opinion in this regard goes like this: A guy is getting sold in the market and I think a human value is always much more than this, right? So, the amount of Dowry you take will fix up a husband’s cost in the marriage market and will a husband get resold if any other daughter’s parent offers more than the initial investment cost or the valuation should be based upon depreciation cost analysis?
Like this there are many beliefs which are always in queue to arrive at specific time in a person’s life. Do we give enough freedom to a person, to use his/her reasoning power to accept or deny the practice?
Or is our analytical power now limited to only:
Writing Software Programs? Or
Making Business Deals? Or
Designing and Running a Machine with a 100% Efficiency? Or
Operating on a Bed Ridden Person?
Now a very basic question:
Were you able to read the matter written over here? I am very much sure; it would have taken less than 10 minutes of your very precious life. If I ask you to write the same stuff again (Don’t copy paste), I am pretty sure, many great thinkers would be living out there, who can script this in a more graceful approach.
So, by a very basic definition defined earlier, everyone is a Literate.
Now, just give it a reflection: Is really the reading and writing which matters to be called as Literate? Or is it the implementation of our learning with a sincere effort makes us a Literate in real sense?
It is not Reading and Writing of a Computer Manual which makes a person Computer Literate. It is only after he/she can practically work on Microsoft Office or for that matter at least can start and run computer for this or the other work.
A mere Reading and Writing of Examination papers won’t allow an engineer to be a Technical Literate about his/her subject. It is only when he/she is able to Read; Write; Design and; Understand the logic behind the structure built.
I personally feel then to define ‘Literate’ in a fresh approach as:
A person who is able to: Read; Write; Understand and Implement.
So, if next time you see someone or feel yourself disrespecting any basic learning of life, do ask yourself a question:
Are we really Literate?
As I am writing about this, most of the male readers might get annoyed with me, but, female readers, I can think of them becoming my fan.
Jokes apart, are we really interested even to know or think about this? I do agree with the fact, girls are now making out their way in a globalized world to work along with boys on every professional front possible.
A person is educated, so that he/she should be able to take own decisions of his/her life.
But, do they still have become an integral part in taking decisions on family matters? Are they even free enough today, to take their own decisions of life?
Why a girl after marriage has to bind herself with the customs, traditions, ways and rituals performed at her husband’s place? Why can’t we think of, to give her a chance to teach us a different and a better manner in which a ritual or an occasion is celebrated, which she has learnt for past around 24 – 25 years at her place? Why she has to leave her family name, only to get attached with our one?
I always feel proud then about a girl, who has that strength enough to leave behind her a surrounding in which she has been brought up. She has to part ways with her parents; friends; relatives only for a cause of marriage.
I don’t say ‘Ghar Jamai’ ban jao, but, can we for that matter show some support; respect; and love for a girl who has left behind her own family to make ours an integral part of her life.
Also, what about the aspirations of a girl, after her education? I don’t think today also there are people around who will allow their daughter – in – law or for that matter a husband would support a wife, to aspire for her dreams after marriage. Or is the education of a girl child limited only to get her married in a well settled family.
This trend is moving south in direction, but, that too only because of high standard of living conditions; and to manage the household expenses in metropolitan cities. Still a girl only has to live up to her in laws expectations, along with a job. Why can’t a guy think of helping out a girl in daily chores of a married life, to make it a perfect one?
Sacrifice of a career is always due on a girl, can a guy ever think of it, if a wife is having better career prospects than a husband. Killing of someone’s aspiration is a sin and it should not happen in anyone’s case, be it a girl or a guy.
9) Blind follow up of Traditions and Rituals.
This is not meant at all to hurt anyone’s emotions or feelings, which people have for their customs and traditions, around which a person’s life revolve from the day he/she starts to breath, till the end of journey on earth.
A person is pure in its form only at the instance he/she arrives in the world, making its way out of the womb of a mother. After that a name is attached to the person.
A name of a: Country; Region; Religion; Caste; Sub Caste; Family. A child who is not even aware of his/her existence, is bound to all the Traditions; Rituals; and Customs attached to the name with which it has to start life only to end with the same given name.
Every coin has two sides attached to it, goes a very old proverb. So, every given name must be having something Good and something Bad as an integral part of it. Do we then give an enough freedom to our highly qualified children to praise the Good and at the same time criticize the Bad things attached to the name, with which they are living?
It is said that: An education is imparted to a child for enabling him/her to think and understand the Good and Bad things of life. Do we really give that chance even, to a child for him/her to take the decision upon accepting the Excellent and discarding the Appalling attached to the given name of him/her (Then be it, Name of: Family; Sub Caste; Caste; Religion; Region; and Country)?
I would like to share herewith 2 instances of my life regarding this heading I am writing about:
1st Instance:
I was in 1st year of engineering, and my cousin’s wedding was scheduled in the same year.
Everything was going around smoothly in the marriage. When I saw a ritual, which really perturbed me and still it gives me a shiver in my body; about how can one think about it also, though it being a tradition.
It was about: Girl’s parents have to wash the feet of to be Son – in – Law.
I asked my Dad about this, when he told me, it being part of some ritual. I was plainly taken aback by this. I asked him a very simple question to which, I think every person in this world will be unanswerable if he/she agrees with this tradition or any such similar kind of custom happening in their Caste; Religion; likewise same happened with my Dad:
Can you ever in your weirdest dream also think of: Allowing your parents to wash your feet? Then how can in the name of tradition alone, a person can think of allowing someone else’s parents to wash one’s feet?
I had once a very good debate on this with one of my friend, who told me something like this:
Aisi kuch manyata (Belief) hain ke, aisa kuch karne se Swarag ki prapti hoti hain.
And that too, alone Girl’s parents are bound to abide this tradition. I am not here to play ‘Tit for Tat’, but, then Boy’s parents are not supposed to behave the same with to be Daughter – in – Law. Kya ladke ke Maa Baap ko swarag ki prapti nahi chahiye hoti hain kya? Then I will always pray for a Girl child, as I don’t want myself to land up into hell.
Aur shayad isi ko kehte hain: 100 chuhe khakar billi chali Haj ko.
By doing this alone we are assured of going to Heaven after end of our breath. Let alone then whatever might be the number of Sin we perform, which assures our entry to Hell.
2nd Instance:
I had a good discussion with a very great friend cum elder brother of mine, Rajesh Hendge. He explained me the blind follow up of traditions, in a very simple and subtle manner with a help of a story, which I would like to narrate hereby (In Hindi):
Ek gaon main, ek pujari raha karta tha. Uska naam tha: Harkishan. Harkishan ka kaam gaon ke Mandir main roj shaam ko havan karvana hota tha. Uske paas ek pyari billi bhi thi, jo usne bade laad pyaar se apne saath rakhi hui thi. Par uske saath ek dikat hua karti, woh jab bhi havan par baith ne jata, uski billi uske aas paas mandarane lagti. Pujari ko darr tha, ki kahi billi uchlte kudte hue kisi din havan main na gir jaye. Isliye usne is par upay dhundha aur us din ke baad se woh har roj havan ke samay billi ko rassi se ek kone main bandhkar, bade sukun se puja karne laga.
Din mahine saal bite, pujari ka ek din swarg waas ho gaya. Uske baad gaon ke mandir main havan karne ki jimedari, uske shishya: Raghu, par aa gayi. Raghu ko bhi pujari ki billi se bada lagav tha, aur woh uska har samay khayal rakhta. Par billi ke nathkat svabhav ke chalte, woh bhi use rassi se ek kone main bandhkar, sukun se puja karta.
Aise hi phir aur din mahine saal bite, billi ka bhi dehant ho gaya. Raghu ke budhepan ke chalte uski jagah ab uske bete: Chandan, ne le li.
Jab pehli baar Chandan mandir main havan karne baitha toh aas paas khade logon ne usse kaha: ‘Arey, tumne havan ko shuruvat kaise ki, pehle kisi billi ko rassi se toh bandhkar ek kone main khada karo, phir hi havan ho payega sahi dhang se’.
I think this story tells a lot about the topic I am discussing herewith, and no further explanation would be needed on.
To name a few more, prevalent in Indian society:
1) Manglik
A concept beautifully presented in: Munna Bhai Lage Raho.
2) Dowry
Today also, in Indian Matrimony Market, dissimilar degree holders are having different price tags.
Engineer: Rs. 10, 00,000;
MBA: Rs. 25 to 30, 00,000;
Doctor: Rs. 30 to 50, 00,000.
Again these degrees fetch more if you are an IIT/IIM/AIIMS pass out.
Parents of to be husband takes pride in these issues, but, my sincere opinion in this regard goes like this: A guy is getting sold in the market and I think a human value is always much more than this, right? So, the amount of Dowry you take will fix up a husband’s cost in the marriage market and will a husband get resold if any other daughter’s parent offers more than the initial investment cost or the valuation should be based upon depreciation cost analysis?
Like this there are many beliefs which are always in queue to arrive at specific time in a person’s life. Do we give enough freedom to a person, to use his/her reasoning power to accept or deny the practice?
Or is our analytical power now limited to only:
Writing Software Programs? Or
Making Business Deals? Or
Designing and Running a Machine with a 100% Efficiency? Or
Operating on a Bed Ridden Person?
Now a very basic question:
Were you able to read the matter written over here? I am very much sure; it would have taken less than 10 minutes of your very precious life. If I ask you to write the same stuff again (Don’t copy paste), I am pretty sure, many great thinkers would be living out there, who can script this in a more graceful approach.
So, by a very basic definition defined earlier, everyone is a Literate.
Now, just give it a reflection: Is really the reading and writing which matters to be called as Literate? Or is it the implementation of our learning with a sincere effort makes us a Literate in real sense?
It is not Reading and Writing of a Computer Manual which makes a person Computer Literate. It is only after he/she can practically work on Microsoft Office or for that matter at least can start and run computer for this or the other work.
A mere Reading and Writing of Examination papers won’t allow an engineer to be a Technical Literate about his/her subject. It is only when he/she is able to Read; Write; Design and; Understand the logic behind the structure built.
I personally feel then to define ‘Literate’ in a fresh approach as:
A person who is able to: Read; Write; Understand and Implement.
So, if next time you see someone or feel yourself disrespecting any basic learning of life, do ask yourself a question:
Are we really Literate?
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